Most of us have a healthy attitude towards how we feel about ourselves. Confidence and self-esteem define the beliefs each person holds about their abilities and how they interact with the wider world, and it is perfectly healthy to have occasional doubts in our abilities or have concerns about how we think others may perceive us.
However, if a person suffers from low self-esteem, they tend to only focus on the negative side of their personality and concentrate solely on mistakes they believe they may have made. They may tell themselves they are not good enough and reinforce their misguided beliefs that family, friends and colleagues also share this negative view.
The issue for many people who suffer from low levels of confidence is that they can struggle to understand the amount of acceptance and rejection in their lives, leading to self-esteem problems, when they are, in fact, very capable and intelligent.
By not having confidence and belief in their abilities, a person may feel that cannot complete a task successfully or are ‘not up to the job’. It’s incredibly difficult to summon up confidence if an individual is convinced they will not perform well, and if this behavioural pattern is repeated and left unchallenged the vicious cycle will continue.
What are the causes of low self-esteem?
Confidence and self-esteem issues often stem from childhood. The environment in which a person was raised, school-life and even the media can all send positive and negative messages that may make a person feel they cannot meet other people’s expectations.
Difficult life events or trauma can also contribute to low self-esteem, serious medical issues or bereavement can all play a part in lowering self-esteem.
Having issues with low confidence can play a significant part in developing anxiety and depression. It can also cause physical symptoms such as an eating disorder or can lead to unhealthy habits including drug use or alcohol abuse.
People who already have a generalised anxiety disorder (GAD) are often more likely to struggle with their self-esteem—making it important to seek help to improve their self-perception and gradually build their confidence.
CBT offers a new perspective on low self-confidence issues
Low self-esteem is a treatable condition, and cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) is an evidence-based therapy that can help those with confidence issues to identify and address the negative thoughts and feelings they have about their worth and abilities.
CBT focuses on the theory that these negative beliefs are just opinions maintained by unhelpful thinking or behaviours. To increase confidence levels, cognitive behavioural therapists use proven strategies to help the person test these beliefs to develop a new set of more realistic and helpful behaviours. By teaching a person that their perceptions do not stand up to evidence, they can begin to identify alternative, more positive interpretations about how others may view them.
By working with a qualified CBT counsellor, clients can explore the connections between their negative feelings or thoughts and understand how these behaviours are causing them anxiety and confidence issues.
For anyone with low confidence taking the first step in seeking help is often the hardest part, but by discussing practical ways to recognise and deal with the unhelpful thoughts and behaviours a person can begin to rebuild their confidence levels and self-belief.
The theory behind the CBT philosophy is to help clients to see that it is not our experiences that determine our feelings, but instead our interpretation of those experiences. By learning how to process the information more positively, a person can gain a healthier perspective on how to uphold these changes.
Don’t suffer from low confidence, we can help
Jamie Dempsey is a qualified and accredited Cognitive Behavioural Psychotherapist with the British Association for Behavioural Psychotherapies (BABCP: 090911) and has over twenty years of clinical practice experience working within primary and secondary mental healthcare settings.
Jamie has proven experience in helping clients understand how their confidence issues cause anxious thoughts and helps them to recognise their strong points and rethink their negative attitude towards their perceived weak points. We provide a safe, supportive and compassionate environment where our qualified therapist can help clients better understand what they are experiencing to make changes and live life to the fullest. Call 07881 348 694 and start making positive changes today.